korea is fun and cool. im like a little kid who's fascinated to see everything around me. all the things i grew up with....... like the elders passing out flyers or selling little things in the streets, the signs for shops and restaurants that are dying to be noticed among hundreds of other ones, and the subway stations and streets filled with busy people walking fast and expressionless trying to get to their destinations................. make me think and think... about life and korea.

ever since i left to korea in 1999, whenever something unfortunate happened to me i'd always tell myself "things would have been different if i lived in korea..." like i was always disadvantaged because of my background. but i realize that my life in america was very comfortable indeed and many people i see every day here may be wondering how much easier life would be in america.

south korea's geographical size is about 1/4 of california (actually less) but it holds about 16 million more people. but what strikes me the most is the fact that only 20% of this land is useable because its 80% mountains.

i feel like life in korea is one giant survival game. people are shoulders to shoulders competing against each other to come out on top in this crowded land with scarce resources... this probably explains koreans' unmatchable work ethic.



one last thing i want to add is that ive become very afraid of feeling exposed... ive caught myself on numerous occasions when i did something extra and unnecessary to protect myself from possibly feeling exposed/embarrassed. can you guess what kind of situations they were? probably not.


but im feelin pretty good these days. way better than before. so hooray for me